Attack of the Sue
by Spontanious Combustion
Summary: Moonbeam Amber Rain Yesterday Star Unicorn Ebony, "Mary Sue", has slipped through the dimensions and into Konoha! Why is everyone acting so weird, and what will the characters do about it? R&R, please. Rated T for Sue's clothes and a few curse words.
1. Chapter 1: INTRO

CHAPTER 1 – INTRO

((Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Bleach, the concept of Mary Sues/Gary Stus, etc. and if I did, I would be a rich woman who didn't make fanfiction.

A/N: Thanks for visiting this! I have no idea if I'm ever going to finish the story or not, but I hope to.))

The swish of a black cloak disturbed the quiet night air, and the world seemed to fall into a hush, a lull, a point of nothingness. But that same air was soon filled with the sound of musical, bubbling laughter that came in gales, yet was as light as a bell.

This voice belonged to a tall girl, who seemed to be everything a girl would want to be. Her body was slim, yet she was voluptuous and round of hip. Shiny black hair cascaded down her shoulders in curls that resembled a waterfall, ending neatly at her waistline, and contrasted greatly with her pale skin. She wore a dress that showed off every feature in an elegant manner (but in a scantily-clad sort of way). The strangest thing about her was her eyes, which glowed and sparkled at the same time, in the strangest shade of red – no, blue – wait, green? It changed every few seconds.

"Gary, darling," she said, winking, "Where shall we venture this time?" She appeared to be speaking to no one.

A quiet voice answered her. "It doesn't really matter where you go, Mary. We can never really be in the same place together; people will find us too easily." A figure stepped out of the shadows, definitely male. His features were shadowy; ghostly, even. But nonetheless beautiful.

He waved his hand and the air around it distorted slightly, bringing up images of people, places, things, etc. It seemed to be random at first, but it became clear that he was, in fact, drawing up pictures from various Japanese comics. "We've invaded so many worlds… so many that I'm not sure where else we could go. But I feel like re-visiting the place they call 'Bleach'. You?"

The euphonious sound of laughter cropped up once more. "I want to go to that 'Naruto' place again!" Mary giggled. Gary shot her a questioning look – she had been there several times in the past week. She explained: "It's the _BOYS_! There are so many, and they're all dark and handsome… like you, of course, but I despise the idea of incest. No offense. Actually, I despise _being_ in incest. I don't mind when other people do that. Like those Uchiha boys…" she licked her lips and, strangely enough, it didn't alter her lipstick in any way. "And I can go as many times as I want and the story starts over; they never remember it! At least I know not to give my full name nowadays. It scares people off. I mean, 'Moonbeam Amber Rain Yesterday Star Unicorn Ebony'? Our mother was quite the weirdo."

"And what kind of a name is 'Glass Archangel Requiem Yonder Shadow Tarot Understanding'? I say you have it much better than I do. At least we use acronyms now. And our parents didn't have much to boast about, either. 'Fandom' and 'Ignorance' aren't really names you want on a résumé. Do you think I should have an animal familiar this time? A raven would do. So are you going yet or not?" He obviously wanted a subject-change. The reminder that his first name was "Glass" was terribly unwanted.

"Maybe," Mary said, smirking devilishly. "Have you seen Marty or Anti lately?"

Gary scowled. "No. I'm leaving now."

And with that, the distorted circle expanded and the two stepped through it.


	2. Chapter 2: ARRIVAL

CHAPTER 2 – ARRIVAL

((Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Bleach, the concept of Mary Sues/Gary Stus, etc. and if I did, I would be rich and wouldn't write fanfiction.

A/N: Once again, thanks for visiting this! I don't know if I'm going to finish the story, but I hope to, yadda yadda yadda. Now let's get this show on the road!))

The sky was a churning black color, the charcoal clouds twisting their way through the expanses above. Wind wailed and threw fits of debris every which way, a significantly large piece hitting a passerby in the head.

"Ouch!" The girl looked skyward, squinting. "That's so strange… the weather was beautiful only minutes ago." In a whirl of pink hair, she quickly turned to her friends and they hurried into the café. Small bells clanged as they entered, repeating the sound as the door hit its frame with a crash. The group looked at each other nervously as numerous light objects hit the window.

One of them shivered, though she was wearing a large jacket. "D-do you think it's s-s-some kind of omen?" Her voice cracked uneasily, white eyes wild. Another female placed her hands on the speaker's shoulders.

"Don't worry, Hinata. It's just a storm, nothing more. Besides," she laughed, her brown hair buns shifting slightly, "We're ninjas! We can handle anything! Right, girls? …Girls?" The others stared at her with uncertain expressions. Only the one who appeared to be waiting for them at the table looked unnerved.

"I've ordered jasmine tea for everyone, since we're taking so long. I hope nobody minds." The girl speaking leaned her chair back, the picture of ease and unconcern. The others muttered their thanks (or various curses) and they all sat down.

Ino, who had ordered the tea, lowered her chair to its original position and listened to the small talk of Sakura, Hinata and Tenten. Most of it was about whether it actually _was_ a bad omen to have such terrible weather. All of the members seemed to have other small warnings: broken mirrors, black cats and whatnot. After the tea had finally arrived, she snorted at their comments. "I wish Temari weren't in Suna right now. Then she'd slap some sense into you three. No offense or anything, but that kind of stuff doesn't really mean anything."

She reached for her teacup, which instantly cracked.

Looking at the other table-mates, it was discovered that they had all made the gesture at the same time and had the same result. Face-palms ensued.

"I don't care if it's God, spirits or oni, but some kind of divine intervention is going on and _somebody_ is trying to tell us something," Sakura said, drinking her tea anyway. "If we tell Tsunade, she'll just laugh at us for being superstitious. Actually, that will happen if we tell anyone at all. I think the best idea is either to leave the village or wait for a sign from above."

An echoing giggle floated through the air. Everyone could hear it, but no one could pinpoint it. Yes, something was going to happen to Konoha, and its name was Mary Sue.


End file.
